To Say i Love You Right Out Loud
by pseudo-shigure
Summary: ZoroXSanji. yaoi. AU. it's Zoro's way to say that he loves Sanji.


Title: To Say "I Love You" Right Out Loud

Title: To Say "I Love You" Right Out Loud

Pairing: Zosan. AU.

Disclimer: Not mine.

Summary: It's Zoro's way to make the one he loves happy.

AN: so I listened to Joni Mitchell-Both Sides Now and remembered the scene from Love Actually where Alan Rickman wife tried to hold back her tears when she knew her husband gave a better gift to his girlfriend. And then the wife still trying to look all happy for her family. Well, yeah, I just wanna write something close to it. And I really love the song. And the movie.

I think the universe is the same from How Far yes, I haven't updated it. Sorry. maybe it happened somewhere in their future…

Or maybe I just need to write an angst…LOL

And oh, just ignore my grammar error. It's all over the place, I know.

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It'd been years since they get together. Sanji owned a famous, top class restaurant. And Zoro, being a simple minded man as he is, was already satisfied with his little dojo, always filled by little kids laughter and dreams.

They both lived in a fancy apartment by Sanji's request. And Zoro couldn't care less about those material things. It didn't hurt ego either that Sanji was the one who paid most of their bills. They'd talk about those trivial matters and such things wouldn't affect their relationship and respect for the other.

They knew themselves. Sanji was high maintenance, high class kinda guy. While Zoro was a simple guy who felt content just knowing he could live his life the way he wanted. They were different, and that was attracted them to one another.

But Sanji got back to home very late almost everyday, busy with works or socializing with his friends. His high class friends that Zoro couldn't get along with. And Zoro would already asleep when Sanji arrived. In the couch at the living room most of the time, waiting for the blonde to come home.

Sometimes Sanji frustrated over Zoro's lack of manners, lack of motivation on anything, and on his simple-mindedness. And Zoro knew Sanji's friends were laughing at him behind his back because he wasn't like them--well-educated, rich, and pretty.

And deep down in the dark, untouched corner of his heart, Zoro knew that if someone ever asked Sanji about his ideal type of man, the blonde would describe someone that total opposite of Zoro. The blonde might not realize it. But Zoro knew.

And there was a point in time in the relationship when a third person comes into their life. A former crush. A childhood friend growing up to be a perfect man.

He was a renowned businessman. Bachelor of the year or some sort. The blonde could talk about matters of the world with him for hours. He would take Sanji for an unplanned weekend in Paris. The only thing that he lacked of was a brick wall of insecurities that would stop him from whispering little sweet nothings into Sanji's ear whenever he wants.

Now, Zoro ate left over dinner more and more. And no one woke him in the middle of the night to tell him to move to bedroom. He hated that. He wanted to do something about that, but didn't know what. Most of the time he thought he should just left. As long as he knew the one he loved would still be happy and loved.

So he dressed up on March 2nd, tried to make himself fit into Sanji's standard. He mingled with people he didn't really agree, and listened to conversation he don't really understand. Drinking wine instead of rum. With an expensive designer watch kept safely in his jacket inner pocket. The one Sanji showed him on the rare occasion when they shopped together. The one he bought with months of saving.

The blonde was smoking alone, taking the night view from his prided restaurant balcony. And Zoro muttered a 'happy birthday, shitty cook' to him. They stood side by side against the railing.

Sanji took a glance of Zoro in a suit and smiled, "You look good in a suit. I've told you that."

"I feel like clown." Sanji only laughed. And Zoro wondered, does the other man make him laugh like that.

"You haven't give me my present."

"I haven't." Zoro had a victorious smirk on his face.

For once, Zoro knew he could impress the blonde. Showed him that he listened to what the blonde said. Knew what the blonde wants. Actually give him a present that wasn't an apron with crazy words.

And maybe Sanji would see him differently then.

He sneaked his hands into his pocket and felt the velvet box inside it. Decided that it was the perfect time to give him lover his birthday present. He was going to show Sanji what he got for him.

"Oh Zoro, look what I got!" The blonde showed him the watch around his left wrist. The one that Zoro bought. But not the one from him. Sanji didn't need to tell him who was it from.

His hand stop in his pocket. His heart sunk to the bottom. And he felt like he lost his footing.

"It's the same one like the one I want, remember?" the blonde showed him enthusiastically. But Zoro's expression was just a blank. "Tsk. Of course you don't remember. You never remember about this kind of things," whined the blonde. Sanji looked at the watch. "But it's customized, you see. It has my name written on the back. Can you imagine how expensive?" All the while not noticing Zoro's tightened grip against the railing. "I really love it, Zoro." Sanji smiled at him so sincerely. And he didn't understand why his chest ached so bad to see the smile he loves the most.

His jaw tightened. And his face felt stiff and hurt. He ran his hand over his face and took a deep breath. When Sanji asked him does the watch look on him, he just nodded without even look at the blonde. And then Sanji asked for his present.

"I.. uh.. I," words couldn't formed in his brain, "I… haven't bought it."

"Don't know what to buy?" asked the blond half-heartedly. He nodded. "Why are you so confused? You're gonna get me on of those tacky crazy apron anyway."

Zoro faked a laugh. And it sounded obviously forced.

"Or maybe.. you completely forgot about my birthday!" The green haired frowned. Not of confused, but surprised. Didn't know his lover thinks so low about him.

"I didn't forget about it," he answered, barely audible.

"Oh," was Sanji's only answer before he back to his smoke and the amazing view before him.

"Sanji."

"Hmm?" he didn't turn around.

"Do you think I should leave?" The blonde turned finally and frowned at Zoro. "I think I should. Leave."

"What? Now?" Zoro nodded. "Where?"

"I don't know."

"Zoro?" the blonde asked questioningly.

"Will you be okay if I'm gone?"

Sanji laughed before answered, "You're weird, you know that?"

"Will you be okay?" pushed Zoro.

Sanji's frown deepened. "Where are you going? Why? It's my birthday party you know that."

"Yes, I know. I'm sorry. But will you be okay?"

Sanji still didn't understand, but he somehow knew it was urgent. "I think I'll be fine."

Zoro looked relax immediately, "Good," and he got closer to his lover. He took him in his arm. And buried his face into his lush golden hair.

He took the scent and restored it in his mind. Tried remembering the way it felt when it was drench in sweat when they were having sex. Remembering the way it sways when the owner laughed. Remembering the felt of it rubbing his cheek when they fell asleep on cramped couch while watching classic movies.

Sanji knew the way Zoro embraced him was different than the usual. Like he kept so many things from him. Like he wanted to tell him all that but didn't know how. Like if he didn't do it now, he couldn't do it ever again. But Sanji didn't say anything. He just let him.

He noticed how his lover changed lately. He would woke up in the middle of a night and found Zoro, who wouldn't sacrifice his sleeping time for anything, wide awake and watch him sleep. He would wake up early and wait for Sanji to prepare his breakfast instead of keep dozing of. And he would ask weird questions like 'what do you like about me?' or 'why are you staying with me?'. Sanji usually just laughed it off. Sometimes because he didn't know what to answer.

When Zoro let go, they stared at each other with unspoken words between them.

"Bye then," Zoro forced a smile.

"I'll see you later, right?" Sanji asked, the way Zoro always said to him whenever they parted.

And Zoro only stared at him silently for a few moments.

"Bye." He then turned around and walked away.

Sanji watched the back of Zoro got further away from him before finally lost in the crowd. He thought about it for a while. Before someone called him and told him it was time to blow his candles. Time to celebrate his life.

And Zoro departure was soon forgotten.

XXXX

Why do I end it like that?? I confused myself XDD


End file.
